Active listening as a healer means leaning in, watching cues, identifying the tell of uncertainty or confusion while a person is talking about something else.

Did you catch it? The patient, or neighbor, or friend, flashed it for just a second to see what you would do. There- see it?

If you can ID the signs of unconscious suffering in someone else, you are flexing your growing emotional intelligence. If you can do this consistently, patients, friends, family members will start sharing their painful sides with you. As witness to their suffering you really are affirming them, building a space for them to begin to heal.

And then you move on. Next patient, next ward, next nursing desk, next case- next meet up with a cousin.

At day’s end, how are you doing?
Did you feel irritation when your dog jumped up to greet you? A floating sadness about your life that seems unexpected? A sudden burst of anger over a news item? Where did that come from?

This blog is about staying well while staying sensitive. I’m a doctor still learning to thrive. If you care for patients, or just your friends, I’d love to have you along. Let’s figure this out together.

Because I don’t want to sit the next one out.